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Oregon ACA Intergroup Board Election results:


Chairman: James D., Vice Chairman: Day C., Recording Secretary: Ed M., Treasurer: Diana M.    Congratulations to these officers for the 2013-2014 session year. Thank you for your service.

 
 

With elections taking place next Monday, (See post below) it might be a good time to revisit the purpose of the Intergroup with a little history.

The Oregon Intergroup quietly celebrated its fourth year of existence last March. What was the first Intergroup meeting like? We had four members representing three meetings in the Portland area.

Below are the minutes from this second meeting which outlines some of the early goals. Be sure and take a minute to reflect on the importance of having an active ACA Integroup.

Minutes from ACA Intergroup Meeting

March 30th, 2009

Present were Robin G and Don W from the Wednesday night groups, Ann W from the Thursday night group and Chuck from the Sunday night Group. The meeting started promptly at 6 p.m. In the Vending room at the Alano Club on NW 23rd.

For inspiration we followed the start an Intergroup Guidelines on page 603 of the ACA Big Book.

Item # 1 Meetings: The Intergroup will meet every other week for month or two to expedite the process. It was felt that things have been moving too slow. Meeting times will be the same at the same location. The next meeting will be April 13th.

#2 What are the reasons for starting an Intergroup?:  (a) Promoting attendance, …

This Saturday is the Five member panel discussion. Tell your friends and see below for information.

Crossroads: Letting Go Of Old Behaviors & Finding New Ones Click For Flyer
Sponsored By the ACA Oregon Intergroup

Join Panel Speakers: Christine W. (Vancouver ACA); Allison (Monday ACA); Carolyn (Vancouver ACA); Lisa V. (Gresham ACA);
Mary C. (Washington ACA)

Saturday, March 16
3:30-530 p.m.
NW 22nd and Marshall
Legacy Good Samaritan
Auditorium
(1015 NW 22nd Ave, Building
2, Portland, Oregon)

We like the idea of promoting new ACA Meetings, Intergroups, and Websites. Here is a Arizona ACA Website you might want to check out. This link will take you to their Mingus retreat page. Check it out and while you are at it, surf the rest of their website. We had the 2012 retreat featured on our events page last year.

We have had some problems with documents not being able to be shared. Most recently, the Spring retreat. It has been fixed so the link  in the retreat story should work now.  If you have problems opening any documents please email acaoregon@gmail.com and report it.

When: Thursday, April 18, 2013 (5:00pm) –
Sunday, April 21, 2013 (3:00pm)
Where: Pilgrim Firs (360-876-2031)
3318 SW Lake Flora Rd, Port Orchard, WA 98367
How: Click this Link to Get Flyer and mail it to:
Puyallup Valley ACA
C/O: Susan B.
12011 168th St E.
Puyallup, WA 98374
Questions? Contact: Susan (253) 848-9318, email: suswann@hotmail.com
Dusty (206) 399-8131, email: dreambreather0@yahoo.com
Eric (206) 304-8275, email: laxcat34@yahoo.com
Priscilla (503) 616-0913 [Portland], email: prispross@gmail.com Ruth [Portland Carpool Coordinator] ruth.lane@gmail.com

Crossroads: Letting Go Of Old Behaviors & Finding New Ones Click For Flyer
Sponsored By the ACA Oregon Intergroup

Join Panel Speakers: Christine W. (Vancouver ACA); Allison (Monday ACA); Carolyn (Vancouver ACA); Lisa V. (Gresham ACA);
Mary C. (Washington ACA)

Saturday, March 16
3:30-530 p.m.
NW 22nd and Marshall
Legacy Good Samaritan
Auditorium
(1015 NW 22nd Ave, Building
2, Portland, Oregon)

What Is Integration?
We use Steps Six and Seven to remove the defects of character. However we take a different approach for the Laundry List behaviors. We attempt to integrate them through gentleness and patience. Our traits have great value to us if we can embrace them and transform them. 

Until integration occurs, the traits can cause great despair to the Adult Child. We seem unable to change them until we get help. The Laundry List traits represent the false self, which is convinced it is real. The false self disbelieves recovery and the loving nature of a higher power. The false self once protected us, but now it must be retired. We must be patient with ourselves as we integrate the Laundry List in Steps Six and Seven. The traits are deeply anchored because they are the  defense mechanisms we adopted as children under difficult circumstances.

We must acknowledge a certain amount of respect for the traits and for ourselves for figuring out how to survive our dysfunctional homes. As children, they were the difference between living and dying in some cases. We survived, but in ACA we want to move beyond mere survival.*

*From the ACA Text (The Big Red Book) Page 111-112

The ACA Fellowship Text (Big Red Book) is now available as an e-book for the various electronic readers.   Click Here for The Fellowship Book for Kindle on Amazon.    Click Here for The Fellowship Book on Nook or Android related readers through Barnes and Noble.

A Note from the ACA World Service Organization: 

Let us know how these electronic versions work for you using the Contact WSO form. …

Can’t make it to a meeting?  Need Childcare?  No Meeting in your area?

There are telephone meetings on the ACA World Service Organization website. Go to meetings at:   http://www.allone.com/12/aca/ then under countries tab select TELEPHONE from among countries. Then click the NEXT button and it will take you to a long list of telephone meetings across the US.  Scroll down for the list of meetings from Sunday to Saturday, most hours there is a meeting.

In addition to using the 12 steps as structure to recovery, below are listed some important items we  will need to do to find our True Self.

1. Admitting that you are powerless to change your compulsive and addictive behaviours (co-dependency, alcoholism, drug or substance abuse, dysfunctional behaviour patterns) without some help.

2. Committing yourself to learning to identify the unresolved issues you learned from your family or origin.

3. Learning to recognize your family patterns as they occur in your present relationship.

4. Learning to feel and express completely the repressed and/or denied feelings from your childhood.

5. Developing a new understanding of what really happened to you as a child.

6. Developing new feelings connected to what happened to you as a child.

7. Learning to take responsibility for your new thoughts and feelings. This means taking charge of your life and no longer expecting someone else to do it.

8. Developing a new picture of your family of origin and your role in that family without feelings of hurt or condemnations.

9. Feeling compassion for your parents and for yourself as imperfect human beings.

10. Accepting your parents and yourself just the way that you and they are.

11. Forgiving your parents and yourself. This means to “give back” to them what is rightfully theirs and give back to yourself what is rightfully yours.

12. Restoring the wholeness of your mind, body and spirit through the connection with your true self.

Defenses We Use As Adult Children

or “The Ways We Avoid Our Feelings”

   * Agreeing     * Analyzing     * Attacking, Aggression     * Being Smug, Superior or Arrogant     * Blaming, Accusing     * Complying     * Debating, Arguing     * Defiance     * Denying     * Evading, Dodging     * Explaining     * Frowning     * Glaring     * Intellectualizing     * Joking     * Justifying, Moralizing     * Minimizing     * Projecting     * Questioning or Interrogating     * Rationalizing     * Sarcasm     * Shouting, Intimidating     * Silence     * Sparring     * Staring     * Switching     * Theorizing     * Threatening     * Verbalizing, Talking     * Withdrawing    * Grinning, Smiling, or “Laughing Off” feelings     * Preaching/Lecturing, e.g. saying “You” (what you need to do, etc.), instead of “I”     * Quibbling, “Yes, but…”

A recovery Plan is a plan for getting better, not just hoping it will happen. It is something you can measure your progress against or fall back on when you feel stuck. Are you following your plan? Do you need to tweak it? Is it realistic?

However you decide to design a recovery plan, remember, it is not something to beat yourself up about for not following it exactly. It is to be used as a reminder of where you are striving to go. Check it at least once a week and see if you have been following it. If not, make a note on areas you need to concentrate. The idea of a recovery plan is to set a path of recovery so you can achieve it faster. It is being pro-active in that you are not waiting for the Recovery Fairy to tap you on the head with a wand and say “You are Cured.”

Below is an example of a Recovery Plan. The column on the right deals with current recovery issues you may want to concentrate on. As you go along, you may remove some and add others.  The What and When columns are things you strive to do on a daily or weekly basis to be asurred you are working the program.

For More on Recovery Plans, check out Stage II Recovery, Life Beyond Addiction by Ernie Larsen.

Recovery Plan

What:                                                            When                                                Recovery Issue

Meet with Sponsor/Fellow Traveler             Once a Week                              My Feelings/Grief

Join a Step Group and Work Steps               Twice a Month

Reading_______________________________________

Meditation by Nun Sue                                     1 times a Week          Find Balance/ No Shoulds

Adult Children/What’s Normal                       Once a Week

The ACA Fellowship Text                                 Nightly                  Work on Being Disciplined

Read for Pleasure                                                Twice a Week

Meetings                                                        Four Times A Week                             Positive Action

ACA                                                                      Monday 7-8/ or Sat Meet

ACA                                                                      Wednesday 6:30-8                 Practice Affirmations

ACOA                                                                   Thursday 6:00-7:30 / or

Alanon                                                                  Friday 7:30-9:00                      Pray for Awareness

Spiritual                                                                   Daily ___________ 

Meditate                                                             5 times a week                Work Steps 1,2,3

Grattitudes/Prayer                                                         Nightly

Something for Me/Play                                                 Twice a Week

Date with wife                                                                  Once A Week

My Hobby                                                                         Twice A Week

Physical  Activities to Fight Depression or Get In Shape  


Diet/ Drink More Water                                                Daily

Exercise/ Walking                                                           Three times a Week

Journal                                                                         At Least Twice A Week

About Issues That puzzle me

With My Inner child

    * Remember that you will only get out of this experience what you put into it. Attendance is not enough. You must make the effort to practice what you learn so that you can change.

    * Open yourself to the possibility there’s a better way than what you’ve been doing all your life.

    * Promise yourself you’ll try some of the suggestions you hear and keep that promise.

    * Make a commitment to keep coming back, even if you don’t feel like it. Six weeks is minimal to determine if the group is for you.

    * Stop holding back for fear of what others will think of you.

    * Try to make at least one phone call a week to a member of the group. Break the pattern of suffering in silence.

    * Share something every week, even if it’s hard for you to do so. This will help dissolve isolation and victim consciousness as well as build trust.

    * Try to feel at home in the group. Talk to at least one new person every time you can.

    * Remember that you are here to build new behaviours and attitudes. So quit practicing the old ones (at least in small ways, until you are stronger).

    * Listen to what others in the group say and think of how it relates to you. Every person in the room represents an aspect of you. Learn from them.

    * Give yourself permission to be vulnerable.

    * Read all the books and literature about adult children of alcoholics that you can find. Knowledge is power and the truth will make you free.

    * Make the group a priority in your life. Schedule other things around it because you deserve a better life and are willing to work for it.

    * Be willing to be totally honest with yourself at all times. This is the key to knowing that the truth will set you free.

    * Read the 12 steps every day and try to relate them to your life and experience. Use the Serenity Prayer in the same way…wherever you are and whenever you need it.


Use the form below to ask questions or to comment on specific posts. Please indicate which post you are referencing.
If your inquiry is of a more general nature, email us directly: acaoregon@gmail.com

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